i can’t wait to poop in your new toilet

happy new home, hope your neighbors aren't assholes

congrats on your new home bitch

look at you getting a new place and shit

badass homeowner

motherfucking homeowner

alexa, clean the house

siri, clean the house

google, clean the house

congrats on your new place to bone

congrats I can't wait to overstay my welcome

holy shit you bought a house

five star rating; amazing experience will poop here again

fuck you leaving me

good luck finding better bitches