look at you having a kid and shit

let's pray you don't rip

oh shit you've reproduced

sorry you can't drink or fit into pants

wishing your vagina strength

our first mother's day

our first father's day

first birthday as a daddy

i'm the mob

engaged as fuck

holy shit you got engaged

legal as fuck

google, clean the house

siri, clean the house

alexa, clean the house

eww david

chill bitch

squats for likes

your uncle is in my dms

your aunt is in my dms

your cousin is in my dms

your daddy is in my dms

your husband is in my dms